lucky girl

 

 

 

 I'm so happy to still have my blog, this space where I've been coming for over a dozen years to write down my thoughts and experiences, hopes and dreams. It's basically for me to be able to remember times and places, to recall how I felt about certain things, not because of a fear of not being able to but because we take in so much just during a day, much less all the accumulated years of this life.

What I want to share this time is that I had a fall last week that I'm still recovering from, I didn't break anything which is amazing when I replay it all because it was pretty hard. It wasn't an old lady fall but one involving uneven pavement where the side of my boot went over the edge and I went down.

If you've ever been unlucky enough to have this happen to you or someone just walking along beside you, you'll know how fast and also, at the same time, how in slow motion it plays out. I knew I was falling and I could tell it would be on my right side as soon as I felt my knee hit and then my whole side, from hip to arm.

And then, as though I could see it, I knew my face was going to be the next thing to hit the sidewalk ... but then, a fraction of an inch away instead of hard pavement I felt unmistakable softness, exactly like two finger tips cushioning my cheek where it could have been crushed. 

And then it was over except for the getting up part with Larry's help and a quick inventory of my parts while being pretty shaky, both of us. Now, I was told very many years ago that I have seven guardian angels and I've never questioned that or wondered why it takes so many, there have been countless times when I'm sure it has taken them all. They've helped me make it a lot longer than I ever thought possible, given how I've lived. 

You either believe or you don't but I know I would not be me if I scoffed or thought otherwise about this and I do know how very thankful I am when one or all of them remind me of their presence on a daily basis. If you've been around here before you know that I tell it like it is in my world and always appreciate those who want to visit.

that lovin' feeling

 

 

 I was reminded just a little while ago that the most wonderful, life changing, heart opening thing that can ever happen to you is to be loved totally for exactly who you are and supported in decisions you make, right or wrong, even if that cost you a paycheck and to be told that your "little bit of a temper" and your strong, unwavering sense of who you are in the world are the first things that made him fall in love with you. To know that someone has your back and will do any and every thing to be on your side forever is a tremendous, kind and loving feeling. 

We are still struggling over here, still feeling in shock, still being overcome with sadness, memories and emotions every day. So having to deal with petty, mean behavior is even more difficult and unwelcome but it has made us draw even closer together and I didn't think that was possible.

So if you have or know of this kind of love I hope you cherish it, if you haven't found it yet I pray you do and if you haven't kissed and hugged your loved ones today I want you to do it now and as many times as you can.

embracing these seventies

 

                              "You need to claim the events of your life to make yourself yours. When you truly      possess all you have been and done, which may take some time, you are fierce with reality."

                                        Florida Scott-Maxwell  ~ the measure of my days

"Brave is the man who loves a wild woman" ... Johnny Ox

 

 My sweet granddaughter was wed this past weekend. Jenna & Dan finally got to say their marriage vows to each other. We couldn't be with them so on that morning I wanted to start this pair of earrings I'd been interested in learning to do.

I wove tiny beads for hours and thought of her, wondering what she was doing and how she was feeling. I remembered when she was just a little girl but already pretty much a spitfire and I also realized all the wonderful things she's already done in her life and so happy that one of them was to find her forever love.

I came to the computer a few times throughout the day to see if there were any wedding photos, my sister sent me some early the next morning and it was a glorious thing to see all the love & joy.

Also, there is between this special couple a deep understanding of being totally devoted to each other and this new life that they've made so I knew that this pair of earrings would be named Devotion and all this thrills me so, I can't wait to see what happens next.

                                   

books, time, sleep, thoughts

 

 

I was so happy that I had picked up this book from my library yesterday because when you are wide awake at 3:30 in the morning it's always a good thing to have one. 

That's the way my nights have been a lot lately, my thoughts churning away, my brain not being able to stop with worry and trying to come up with plans and solutions, thinking about loved ones and about all that could have happened differently ... or not and why.

Regret is a tough one to deal with, it sets you up to always wonder if you did the right thing, if you could have done better, why you didn't do better, will you do better next time and if you've learned anything at all in your long life.

But here we are with a brand new day of hot sunshine and hope, this new book and ideas for creative projects plus a visit from a wonderful friend a couple of days ago who we haven't seen for a very long time and that reminds us of the most important things in our lives.

slow + steady

 

I've been working on a special gift for the past few days and getting to do one of my favorite things, slow hand stitching. It's an amazing thing how sewing and beading earrings require the same tools, needle and thread, but use such different energy. I stitched most of the day yesterday while I watched all the traffic get crazier and more intense around us,  I'm sure there was some sort of record set for that and for lost people.

But with this kind of work I could just let my mind wander with so many thoughts and memories. With bead weaving and making earrings I really have to pay such close attention every minute ... counting tiny beads, making sure I get the right color each time, making sure the thread doesn't knot, changing directions when needed so I find I can't do it for long periods of time.

I wish I could say that I was one of the types of people who, when slow stitching, adds only good thoughts and intentions in with each and every stitch but I'm not. Oh, there's plenty of good stuff in there but also way too many random, strange mind workings to ignore so plans get made, decisions reached, next projects thought about all while making little marks with thread and piecing parts together. But mostly it is holding close the person you are making for, hoping that they will like it, will use it, will keep it. I've always found that when I know who that person is it makes the making better.

A beautiful highlite at the end of the busy day, late evening on the deck and we got to see a mama raccoon usher her three big babies across the street, she paused to check that all were there then quietly drifted down into the ditch where we hope they are living. It was just the second time we've spotted any around here in all these years.

So, as always, we continue on with our slow, steady art work and marvel that we are smack in the middle of another summertime and, as always, it's all good.

Keeping on

 

I've never thought too much about getting old but I sure have lately. Being children of the 50's and 60's so many of us were convinced we would never reach 30 and yes, so many didn't.

Yet here we are, still trying to figure it out. It's hard to make sense of the world we find ourselves in now because we are people who will always have questions. I love the idea of faith but I lean toward science.

The most important thing I've learned about getting old(er), old(ish) is that there is a lot of time to lose a lot of people and that is some heart breaks that we're dealing with.

So while living in such a special place that also happens to be at the top of the list for loud noise every minute of every day we are making efforts to remain calm, to keep doing what helps us the most ... taking advantage of the studio space we have, putting ideas into being with clay, fabric, tiny beads and beautiful gifts from nature, walking, taking photos and naps, reading and lots of deep breaths.

As we wait today on word about another loved one I wanted to share a few of the most recent pieces from Larry.